Back to the Future: A Shitty Click-the-Hint button game.
I don't think I've ever met anyone who doesn't like Back to the Future, but sometimes reasons may vary. I mean people may like it because time travel is great and all that, or because cars are cool, or a floating skate is everything they've ever wanted, or they connect with the Lithuanian roots of the director, fuck, there's lots of reasons to like those movies. My neighbor used to love the DeLorean, and I remember taking a picture of that goddamn car in, I don't know, Universal Studios was it? Whatever, it was a shitty picture because people wouldn't stop crossing in front of the car and because there just wasn't enough space to take pictures. I think there may have been a stupid tent right next to it making pictures an impossible task. It's not that important really. The point is, people love Back to the Future.
I remember the Saturday morning Back to the Future cartoon (maybe they used to show it on Sundays, fuck me if I know), and it was just stupid. I mean I still watched it because it was Back to the Future, but the only thing I recall is the time train from Back to the Future 3. Goddamn, what a stupid idea. Anyway, there was nothing of note in that cartoon that I can remember. But why the fuck would you travel with a flying time train anyway? That thing is bulky as hell and you'd be an idiot not to spot the fucking flying train no matter what time you're from, jeez.
Anyway, I bought the Back to the Future Telltale game let's say, a year and a half ago, and finally got around to play it. But there's just so little to say about it because of how boring and bland it is. I can barely remember what the game was about, but that's fine. No one wants some jerk on the internet spoiling the damn game they bought. What I'll say is this. The first episode was actually fun. I had some good moments with it and the music was neat and cool. The second episode was fun too. But then the game became so incredibly monotonous from the third episode on, it was like a terrible, unending, repetitive commission of menial tasks designed to just keep you clicking everywhere in the screen to make something work. I mean I grew up playing point and clicks and all that crap, don't give me that look. Of course I know that's how it works. You don't get to this point in life without beating a couple of LucasArts games is what I'm saying. But where Indiana Jones is about being creative, this game is about picking your nose while expecting some of the crap to work while waiting some literal 7 minutes for a second chance at trying to make it work again in case you failed the first time. And dude, you'll fail a bunch of times. Failure in this game is particularly annoying because it controls like garbage and everything is just so slow that you wish some time traveler would go back in time and prevent you from buying it in the first place. The back and forth this game forces upon you would be completely unacceptable if the plot wasn't any good, but at least there is that, though I reckon you could watch someone play it on YouTube and you'd get a generally jollier experience from it than from actually playing. Added to that is the fact that Telltale love to add easter eggs such as random crashes, bugs and performance issues. The joys of gaming.
So the point is, this game is to the point and click genre what loltapirs were to internet memes: At first they were funny but then no one gave a shit and you just clicked away because there was nothing else to do until people stopped making them.
